I have been away from home for a while now but this week, home feels a little further away.
For those who have managed to miss it or who aren’t from Singapore, here’s the gist of it. Local actor Shrey Bhargava wrote in a Facebook post how he was asked to exaggerate an Indian accent when auditioning for a role in Jack Neo’s Ah Boys To Men 4, which is a local film about army life for male Singaporeans. He was offended, but he did it, and felt disgusted after.
Side note: I’ve been asked to ‘perform’ a Singlish accent among foreign friends before. I did it once, everyone laughed in delight, and I felt that same disgust immediately after. My ethnicity, my nationality, the way I speak in the company of friends and family, is not a party trick. An exaggeration of your identity is not for anyone else’s amusement. Even among foreign friends I sometimes spontaneously break out the Singlish but here’s the difference: doing it because you want to and doing it on request are worlds apart.
Shrey subsequently wrote this post. Many fellow minorities have come out to share similar experiences. Many Chinese Singaporeans have expressed regret, shame, anger. But so many people. SO many people. Have now come out of the woodwork waving a “LOL guess what everyone I’m kinda racist” flag, previously hidden under their beds, previously only taken out in the company of like-minded friends.
I write this as a minority. I write this as someone who has only ever known what it is to be a minority. I have written about racism in Singapore before, and like any minority, I have a lifetime of experiences and examples I could share.
But this week, my heart hangs heavier than it ever has before. For the first time, people I’ve known for years have come out to rant about the validity of Shrey’s experience. “It’s just comedy,” they say.
And you know what? It’s fine if you, as someone who has enjoyed the privilege of being the majority, don’t know what it’s like, or if you can’t imagine why it hurts. But no one who has decided to join the angry mob dedicated to the very public lowering of our flag has stopped to first ask – “Is that how it feels? I had no idea.” And I really wish they had asked; I still hope some will.
You don’t get to decide that just because you don’t know how it feels, the rejection, shame, fear and occasional self-loathing that often comes with being a minority is invalid or should be invisible. Make an effort to understand instead of denying the deep-rooted racism our allegedly racially harmonious country has.
Today, I am especially grateful for my Chinese friends who have stood up tall against other members of the majority race who demean and invalidate the experiences they will never have the misfortune of knowing. In the same way I believe men are a key part of feminism and equality, the ethnic majority has a voice they can use for good. Not like xiaxue. Please don’t be like xiaxue.
But we need to look at the fact that it took one Facebook post to tear a nation in two. It took one man saying, “This is what happened. This is how I feel and it sucks,” before thousands jumped on his words to loudly invalidate them. I get it. It’s uncomfortable to acknowledge the discomfort of others. But if for the sake of our continued comfort we disallow room for honesty, for discussion, for understanding, then our racial harmony is a sham, and a shallow one too.
It feels like this week we, as a country, have failed to live by what we recite in our pledge, what we claim to celebrate as a multi-ethnic nation.
Think of it this way: If it’s uncomfortable for someone in the majority to acknowledge that our country
is racist AF has a long way to go, imagine how it feels for the those who have lived it their whole lives. It isn’t just national pride or illusions of harmony at stake. It’s the dull thud that comes with realisation that in your home country, your identity has been deemed worth less than the entertainment of others, that your real experiences have been voted unfavourable, unworthy of further discussion and understanding. We’ll be ok just don’t talk about it shhhhhh.
I don’t write this in anger, or in hatred. I write this as a member of the minority whose heart hurts this week because the spotlight has at last been shone on the deep-rooted racism many of us tried to pretend wasn’t there, and now there’ s no denying it.
The part that hurts the most is this: Even after all this time and all my own experiences, part of me still desperately wanted to believe in Singapore’s racial harmony, too.
It’s the best concept – a cafe where you can chill and have a drink, surrounded by cats. Obviously it all started in Japan, the land of crazy ideas that actually work.
$12 an hour and $5 for a subsequent half hour and you’re in Kitty Heaven. Except for a few frisky ones, the cats are largely unimpressed by us groveling humans fawning over them. This takes the concept of Spoilt Rotten Cats to a whole new level – they have people giving them head scratches, belly rubs, grooming and cuddles ALL. DAY. LONG.
These kitties don’t run to the door to greet you. They luxuriously lie there and magnanimously allow your grubby hands to worship their soft and silky selves.
What’s good is that it’s extremely therapeutic to be in the presence of that many cats. It’s also the perfect place to sit and get some work done, which I fully intend to do since the cafe is a short walk away from the office.
If you want to write a novel/poem/whatever and don’t have a cat, here’s your spot. As Barbara Holland said, “it would be easier to write with a herd of buffalo in the room than even one cat”. An entire room of cats, therefore, is a writerly must.
As anyone who has/has had/has met/has encountered any cat whatsoever in the briefest of moments will know, they take their time to do as they please. Neko No Niwa is a very catly reminder that the world doesn’t revolve around you, you can’t always have it your way, and sometimes you need to just slow down and smell the kitties (they do smell really nice there).
If you play gently, you can even sort of style the cats, like hipster cat over here, also known as Little Miss Muffet. This style was inspired by Hamilton the Hipster Cat.
If you have your own cats, you might feel like you’ve been frolicking about town with a whole clowder of cats while your own beloved/s wait patiently at home. This will happen, and no one can help you there. Feel the guilt. You deserve it, as your cats will sniffingly and suspiciously tell you.
I’ve been meaning to check out Pulau Ubin for a while (about 10 years would be a fair estimate) and like many things in my life, it’s gotten pushed outta the way in favour of other distractions. Work, travel, pubs, cats, the usual.
So since le bf is in town (check out his food journey through Singapore here) and adventure is our thing, we took the $2.50 ferry from Changi Point Ferry Terminal to Ubin on Friday morning. Don’t be alarmed if the boat suddenly stops moving; it’s just the captain making his rounds, collecting his cash. Ubin is all about the DIY.
You can read all about stuff to do in Ubin here, but some definite highlights worth mentioning.
This might be just me, but wild boars casually strolling about #likeaboss was
just a bit massively exciting for me #boargasm. There were 2 bigger ones and a few little ones, just roaming about. The biggest boar seemed to be in charge of the monkeys as well, so obviously he’s the Big WigPig of the jungle.
On a not altogether separate note, pick up yo trash, kids.
Now, camping. Camping is cool. You feel a bit special when everyone starts to leave for le mainland and you’re comfortably keeping to the island, waiting to see what secrets Ubin will reveal once all these day-tripping visitors are gone. A gorgeous sunset, for one, and hanging out at the coconut/snack store with the island locals.
I’ve heard good things about Mamam Camp but I personally felt like it was too close to man-made buildings to feel camp-y enough. Noordin Camp is closed, so we settled at Jelutong Camp, which is where the awesome sunset photo was taken. The nearest toilets are a 5 minute walk away – bring your torch if it’s already dark. And there weren’t any ghosts – I checked.
One of my favourite parts was the
Che Guevara Chek Jawa wetlands, which is quite unlike anything I’ve seen before. When it’s low tide, the shiny surfaces seem to go on for miles and miles.
Also a great chance to show off my HTC One sweet panorama feature and no they’re not paying me to say this.
Both walking and cycling are a great way to explore the island (anything except hiring a van, our path was once so traffic- and exhaust-free and now you’re all up in our way and everyone hates you) so we hired bicycled on Day 1 and set off on foot Day 2.
Bike prices range from $6 (don’t believe the “from $2” signs on the rental shops – the only thing we found for $2 was a bicycle wash) and cost aside, you’ll want to go for something better. You’ll thank yourself for a pricier but better bike with better gears when
attempting to cycling uphill. The no-pedal freefall on the decline makes it so, so worth it though. Our bikes were $8 a day.
The best view of the quarries has to be up the path beside Merbah Hut, which is towards the Eastern part of the island, overlooking Ubin Quarry. It’s a bit of a climb, but won’t take very long. I’d say the view is worth it. #justkeepclimbing
Nearer to the central bit of Ubin is Pekan Quarry, which is much easier to get to and just as pretty, but not as high up (don’t be lazy go to Ubin Quarry you’re on Pulau Ubin not Pulau Malas).
Besides the quarries #ilovequarries #teamquarries and the obvious adventure of camping, it’s the little random and often WTF things that I love most about Ubin. This sign, for example.
And this sign of a shrine.
For reasons as mysterious as the story behind this shrine, we missed the actual shrine. Apparently the World’s Most Haunted Doll in the universe lives there. It’s like a weird ghost story where we walked past like 6 times looking for it (okay, twice) but for some reason managed to miss it. *twilight zone music*
But I took another picture of another yellow shrine (note, not German Girl shrine) here.
And here is another old, wooden, abandoned house. Even if you hate history, nature, camping and mysterious stories, this place is Instagram heaven. Yes I’m looking at you hipster
she said to the mirror.
My battery had died into the 2nd day, so I sadly missed a couple of great shots of cool naturey things. My favourite bit was the mangrove trees. Seriously, I was all about the mangroves in school.
The best thing about Ubin to me is that everything slows down a bit, as demonstrated by these charming gentlemen – the island’s taxi drivers.
The people are friendly, time takes its time, the sights are gorgeous and the air is fresher – oh so much fresher. I think a weekend in Ubin every now and then would be an excellent reminder (and one needed by most of us
neurotic workaholic Singaporeans) that the brighter pastures we so eagerly seek are perhaps on our own shores.
Well, sort of.